-- <Life's not that simple> --

about me

Name: --William--
Age: --16--
From: --Indonesia--
Job: --Student--

Mini-Bio
food --Sotong, chicken and many moreXD--
drink --Soda--
colour --Blue.. Black..--
game --FF series--
anime --.Hack!!--
manga --Lol.. er...--
book --Harry Potter??.. nice books--
author --None--

Tuesday, August 10, 2004

1:45 am -.- lolz.. i am still awake at my most active period for flow of thoughts again haha.. but.. strangely.. tonight nth comes in.. nth goes out.. just emtpy flow of energy flowing through.. no adrenaline.. no nth.. lolz.. some1 taught me a new phrase.. help for the sake of helping some1.. haha.. i guess.. it's true.. when sometimes we do help others.. most of the time we are caught unprepared.. it's just a do-on-the-spot situation.. when some1 opened their mouth and asked u to.. along the cause however thoughts may develop, things start to take shape.. and conditions may follow.. many thoughts, many things.. yet some pp do it not for the cause of helping another.. yet again, we can ask ourselves, when some1 does a survey on why do pp help another person.. how many of us can guarantee a 'for the sake of helping him/her' 100%? even small kids.. mayb.. help others for a stick of candy? or sth.. in this complex society.. this innocent, pure thought maybe endangered.. therefore, it is spread in books and teachings to be passed on.. not to let it go extinct.. yet some adults themselves are contradicting what they preach.. i have nth more to add.. nth less to lose.. let's just put it this way.. each of us can try to do it.. but in the end how many will succeed.. the number would be near to absolute.. and now along the way of typing this.. more thoughts flow in.. now with a minute injection of adrenaline.. not gonna say.. not gonna do.. nightmares have become part of my life lately.. so sleep time is really best avoided in my case.. but.. i do get lethargic and in the end cant help but succumb to the 'sleep' demon.. truth,lies.. in chinese.. only a letter apart.. yet is the exact opposite of the other.. lies.. white lies.. the context of white lies depends on the person him/herself.. to one it mayb defined as white lies but to another mayb it's a v hurtful lie.. so being true always is the best.. right?.. easy to say.. hard to do.. how many pp can live even 1 day not telling a lie.. almost none.. some things are just created liddat.. even if u wanna change it.. u cant.. desire no lies.. craving for the absolute truth.. possible? if only every single thing can be spilled out.. obstruction in life.. yet another subject tt has involved much contradiction.. some pp say it's gd for u.. some says it's so painful it's best avoided.. faced with this, the conclusion is probably how most pp think tt yes.. u need it to grow up.. to be stronger.. to learn from past mistakes.. best is if u can shape the obstruction.. the obstacle.. into a happy ending.. or sth beneficial.. yet.. whether tt will happen.. no one noes.. not u.. not me.. only he who is up there.. efforts put in.. whether they will pay off.. again.. it's all predestined.. but it's better to die trying than to die with no reason and without knowing how u die.. Sensitivity.. sth most pp need to learn.. sometimes when u do some things or say some words.. it really hurts others a lot.. so i appeal tt all of us do think b4 doing sth.. in case it causes a wound so deep it'll nvr heal.. such as constant insults.. or sth.. anyway.. enough crap for today.. i'm gonna go face my nightmare.. haha.. mayb today it will turn up to be a v sweet dream.. and not a nightmare.. what are the odds?.. little.. but i have no choice but to take it.. coz i can nvr run away from it.. wish upon the canopy of darkness enveloping the sky.. the sparkles of light emanating from the stars.. are my tiny rays of hope.. it is dimming.. undoubtedly.. however.. hope.. isn't sth u can kill tt easily.. hold on till the moment of despair overcomes u.. may things end the way they are meant to be.. whether or not it is wat any1 wanted.. been there.. done tt.. i want to live my life with no regrets.. possible or not.. i duno.. i can only hope.. tt i have made the right decision..

[Missing harmony in life] 01:46

Welcome to my life
Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow u just don't belong
And no one understands u
Do you ever wanna run away?
Do you lock yourself in you room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
With no one there to save u
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desparate to find something more?
Before your life is over
Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
With no one there to save u
No you don't know what it's like
Welcome to my life

No one ever lied straight to your face
No one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy but I'm not gonna be okay
Everybody always gave you what you wanted
Never had to work it was always there
You don't know what it's like what it's like

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
With no one there to save u
No you don't know what it's like, what it's like

Welcome to my life